Know Thyself — Self Discovery Guide
Self-knowledge is power. Many of us go our entire lives not knowing what it is we want, why we do certain things — why we’re even here on this earth. This leads to a life lacking any purpose. We just exist and go wherever the universe takes us, devoid of any fullfillment.
The truth is we already have all the answers within us, we just have to look for them. Every little action you take in life is driven by your unique psychology — everything is connected in one way or another.
A very easy way to get started is to observe the media you consume or have consumed in the past whether that be videogames, movies, books, videos etc.
I learnt the most about myself by thinking about the games I was playing and what they allowed me to do, specifically Fallout New Vegas as it used to be a favourite of mine.
I found that the character I was playing and the things I did mirrored my desires; playing that game allowed me enact who I was or saw myself to be without any repercussions, a clear window into my psyche.
And so that’s where we start. Ask yourself what it is that you loved doing in that game (or whichever media you’ve chosen). Be careful as some of your desires might have been influenced by others onto you through conditioning. Try to look for what truly resonates with you, what you’d value even if you were the last person on earth.
In my case:
- I loved exploring its post-apocalyptic world and taking in the sights.
- Stacking up as much in-game currency as possible.
- Taking on quests which made my character known by everyone and influencing the outcomes for large scale events.
Beneath the surface of those actions lie hidden desires and motivations — there’s a reason why you’re drawn to them in the first place. Lets dig a bit deeper and question it all:
- Why do I like exploring? Because I find it interesting seeing what the world has to offer. I also like being on the move.
- Why might I like having a lot of money? Well it makes me feel good. I like being able to buy whatever it is that I want without a problem.
- Why do I like having this much influence? I feel powerful when NPCs acknowledge my actions and I just like getting things done.
These are still fairly shallow however they bring us one step closer to our end goal. After a few iterations of constant curiosity and questioning, we may boil these down to what they represent at a core level:
- I love the sense of adventure. Being outside deeply fullfills me and there’s a pattern of me enjoying my time in nature a lot. Maybe I should go outside more and see places I haven’t been to.
- I value money a lot as I didn’t have much of it in the past. Having saved up money is important as it makes me feel secure and it reduces my anxiety. I also just find it fun to manage resources.
- I didn’t get much validation from others in the past. I felt weak and worthless and so accomplishing things has helped me feel valuable. I wanted to feel like I was important.
In this essence, gaming had become an escape from the real world where I could become exactly the person I wished to be. I could bypass the discomfort of putting all this into practise and delude myself to think I had attained everything.
Taking it a step further, we can observe our dark sides at play. A craving for power, influence and control might fuel you internally whether or not you want to admit this to others. Understanding this part of yourself and where it springs up the most is crucial when learning about your shadow side; if you are unaware of it, it may fire up one day and cause havoc that could have clearly been avoided had you known you were operating in this realm of conciousness. Moreover, this is a part of yourself that you can tap into to fuel your growth. Repression can only lead to disaster — both for you and those around you.
Remember, everything is connected. These become our new building blocks which can come in handy when analysing other things we do in life. For example, loving nature might mean you prefer summer over winter as it’s a livelier season meaning you’ll be happiest in summer, managing resources might make trading or things of similar nature fullfilling for you compared to other tasks which might feel dull, low self-esteem might mean you’ll find it harder to feel confident about yourself in various endeavours which will require some work on your behalf and will improve your life dramatically once fixed.
The key is to stay curious and question everything inside your mind — become a student of your own psychology. See what you like, what you don’t like, how things make you feel, what makes you hyped etc etc. Keep collecting those little bits of knowledge and over time you begin to put together a larger picture: seemingly unrelated things will begin connecting in ways you wouldn’t expect.
Eventually you’ll reach a point where you just know how certain things are going to impact you. You look at a task and can anticipate it needing more motivation than the others or you visualise your dream life and know for certain that’s what you truly want. You go through life with certaintity knowing you are living your life and not someone elses.
Self-knowledge allows you to be your authentic self and live a life that’s full of meaning. The more you live in accordance to your identity, the higher your sense of purpose will be.
Hope you learnt something new :)
Let me know what you think in the comments or share your experiences
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